Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Vestibulectomy- Day 2

Slept through the night but woke up at 4am to take some Ibuprofen and then again at 6:30am because (to parody the popular Alicia Keys song) bits are on FIRE!

Seriously, I'm in a lot of pain right now. I guess the numbing reagent that Dr. Goldstein put directly to that area yesterday when performing the surgery has worn off. So I'm going to be on Percocet now, possibly exclusively, since the Ibuprofen was not cutting it for my pain.

Randomly, the only thing going through my mind is a parody of "Milkshake."

My vagina brings all the drugs to the yard,
And they're like
It's better than yours
Damn right, it's better than yours
I can teach you
But I have to charge

And then I crack up because I have this bizarre image of all my drugs (Percocet, Ibuprofen, anti-nausea pills) crowding around my vagina with curious expressions on their faces, almost like the pill bottles are mini-doctors Like this dude.

. And one is holding a stethescope and staring pensively at the stitches, and the other is holding a tongue compressor or a knee jerker and basically they are checking me out seriously and considering what to do next to fix up this piece of me.

"Hmm, that's rather a lot of redness over there."
Or "Tsk, tsk, her ice pack is melting."
Or "Why is that stitch pulling at her?"

It cracks me up to think of my pill bottles as mini-doctors, and I'm not sure if that's because of my strange sense of humor or because I'm loopy due to Percocet. But it's probably the former.

Later today, I'll be starting my sitz baths (I have to take 4 per day, spread out through the day, for 20 minutes each) and it's bound to be an interesting experience. Hopefully, it will relieve some of the pain.


adena said...

I think you are so brave to go through this surgery! The percocet should help. Wishing you a quick healing!

Anonymous said...

Refuah shleimah. Very surprised they sent you right home, didn't keep you overnight.