So I'll be having surgery soon.
I have to spend a week on bedrest, and the next five weeks just shuffling around, moving very, very slowly (like a little old man). I have to ice and take sitz baths. I have to take hard drugs (well, if Percocet is considered a hard drug).
I have mixed feelings about all of it.
On the one hand, I want this to be over. The sooner I have the surgery, the sooner I can get to post-surgery, where I work with dilators to stretch the area and can eventually attempt to have non-painful penetrative sex with my husband.
On the other hand, I will be spending six weeks of my life recovering from this operation. Six weeks that will probably be rather lonely. I have TV shows to watch, movies to watch, books to read and so on, but this just isn't my ideal way to spend my time. Especially since I'll need to come up with excuses as to why I'm not available to go out with friends (since I can't explain that I need to shuffle like an old man if I go out with them). At least I was able to take off from work (short term disability is a wonderful thing).
Being rolled around in a wheelchair is not an option because it puts pressure on the site, and the doc really doesn't want me to do that.
So I just hope this all gets better with time.